This is my life now
thecreatureblog is slowly overtaken by the same joke
Hope is dying, resources are scarce, the end is nigh
it doesn’t matter how many “pretend to be dating” fics i read, i’m always fucking in it headfirst every time and i fall for that shit every time. i know the pattern i know the plot twists i know what’s gonna happen but every single fucking time i’m fucking on the edge of my seat wide-eyed whispering like “what’s gonna happen are they gonna fall in love” to myself like of course they are you fucking idiot this happens EVERY TIME but as soon as i see the description and it’s like “x person and x person pretend to do the dating” it’s eternal sunshine of the stupidest fucking mind over here
some muggleborn like “i want to be an astronaut when i grow up!”
wizard kids like “wtf is an astronaut”
"oh you know…the people who go to the moon"
IS THIS TRUE????
As an American I can confirm that this is 1776% true. Some places will even fine you for not eating fried chicken for a week
IM AMERICAN AND IVE NEVER EATEN MCDONALDS IM SO SCARED
damn u gonna die son
I AM SCARED I HATE MCDONALD’S AND I AMERICAN …. AM I GOING TO BE KILLED? WILL SOMEONE HIDE ME! IT’S BEEN 3 YEARS SINCE I’VE PUT ONE OF THOSE NASTY ASS BURGERS IN MY MOUTH…
*sign written in random alleys near my house.*
I harbor mcdonalds fugitives. You may call me Sonchez. If you find me you will live. Find me in the center of Bluffton. Yell out the mcdonalds jingle while in town and if I hear you I will approach you and ask for help finding my dog Pablo.
As a secrecy employee of mcdonalds I can make it look like everyone in the house has been eating mcdonalds for centuries. Find your safe haven.
OH GOD OH GOD I WILL FIND YOU. THANK YOU